Drought
Drought - when a lack of surface water forces plants to root deeper in the ground to reach water needed for survival
Ever been in a place where it seems like God is no where no be seen ~ like you're just needing even a few sprinkles of water to bring relief. The situation may be receiving devastating news or just continual unrest everywhere you turn.
We experienced a drought in our area this past summer. It's during these times of extreme dry weather that plants are forced to root down to find water or they will die. There are times in our spiritual walk that we experience that same drought.
A dear lady I have the privilege of knowing was given the news that her cancer had metastasized to her liver and bones five months ago. Talk about a drought ~ feeling abandoned, devastated, and heart broken ~ yet, I have seen this sweet woman of God root down to the depths of her unwavering faith in a God Who loves her like crazy. WOW! What a beautiful example to each of us who share in her story. Her pain is great, yet, she will tell you, her God is even greater!
So, so very powerful ~
Our seasons of wrestling won't always look like my friend's hard, but they are just as real and require us to make the same decision - will I continue to seek God's face or will I whither in despair.
Jeremiah and David so describe where I have been for a few months now:
He has walled me in so I cannot escape; He was weighed me down with chains. Even when I call out or cry for help, He shuts out my prayer. Lamentations 3:7 & 8
How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Psalm 13:1&2
For several months, I have been wrestling ~ nothing has been wrong, but nothing seems right. Nothing has been terrible, yet, nothing feels good. I have felt abandoned and far from God. I asked my college friends and a few other prayer warriors close to me to pray. I also asked them to not respond with anything ~ I haven't been in a place where I would receive well meaning words in a positive light.
In the mornings, I would attempt to spend time with God. As soon as I started my day, BOOM indescribable feelings of rage, unrest, discontentment, and questioning would ensue me - all day long! With no warning, I would be filled with utter hopelessness and a darkness I have never experienced. Feelings of being overwhelmed would flood me with such despair that I would start to doubt if God even cared.
On October 4, 2023, I journaled, Oh, God, where are You? Where are You . . .
I'm at a spiritual crossroads, will I continue to seek God and root down, even though He seems so far away; or will I lose all hope and whither away. There are times in our lives when we just have to trust, even when it doesn't make sense! We have to reach deeper into our faith ~ not to try and understand our circumstances ~ but to simply trust Him Who is more than able (Ephesians 3:20)! My friend is a beautiful example of purely trusting even when it makes no sense.
At some point in our life, in situations unique to us, we will be forced to ask ourselves this question ~
Rather the rain is falling or not ~ are you going to trust Me. . .
Thank you for sharing your heart, even the raw parts. Long obedience in the same direction is so hard, especially when you can’t see any signs of progress or of an end. Your continued questions and willingness to keep seeking are such a treasure!
Your prayers have been so appreciated, my friend!
The interesting thing about these seasons is this. When you are on the other side and look back remembering you did not “do” Christian well or with poise, as a matter of fact you may have even made it look terrible you will see Him, the lover of your soul, standing silently beside you, praying for you, knowing the pain and uncertainty that floods your soul and making sure that you do indeed arrive on the other side. He alone is that often very dim, barely flickering light at the end of that very long tunnel. Feeling it or not He’s still got you.
Beautiful words! Thank you so much!
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